Uh oh, look at Thomas Edison:
He forgot to take his medicine.

hellfire / heavenwater

One nice thing about chocolate is that the roach parts and rodent droppings blend so well with the color.

claptrap with a clicktrack

Don’t bolt your curry:
We’re in no hurry.

Books are usually considered more valuable when signed by the writer than by the reader.

Perhaps we should have based our infrastructure on fuel that was not poisonous.

Forget that film on Davy Crockett:
It just got shredded by the sprocket.

On one occasion, my parents were entertaining guests. My father was drunk, as usual; he was slathering chocolate cookies with butter and cramming them into his mouth. One guest, startled, said, “Hey, take it easy, Frank.” My father glared at him, and growled, mouth full, “You only live once.”

the autobiography of an autodidact

Let us tie a red balloon
To that gentleman’s bassoon.

(Posted by Doug Skinner)